Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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