Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
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