I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I need water and some morals
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
