It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
