i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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