Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
PANTIES FOUND
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