I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time