I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
