no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
