i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
