I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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