Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize