Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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