I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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