So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
