my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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