Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive