i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize