I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize