Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
it's like iHOP with fire
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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