where does the pee come out of this thing
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
