fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
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