I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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