What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
