She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
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Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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