they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
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