I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
