actually, I'm a sock model
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
