So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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