There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize