I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
