you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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