I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
