Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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