yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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