Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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