I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
