I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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