I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
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Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
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I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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