It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Randomize
