Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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