Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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