I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I am mentally ready for anal.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
