i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
