yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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