now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
