There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
There r osticjed everywhere
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
