what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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