I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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