Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
