Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
